I read in the ‘East Anglian Daily Times’ the other day that cases of depression are rising sharply in this region. A local agency which aims to help people who are suffering from this type of illness, the Suffolk Wellbeing Service put this down partly to the economic climate, which is putting huge pressure on people but also a lessening in the stigma of mental illness with the resulting effect that more people are coming forward for help. This latter is a very positive thing, as depression CAN be treated very successfully through therapy and also – if needed – medication.

One thing I have learnt is that it is important to address mind and body in cases of depression, as they are very strongly interlinked, and having a physical activity (perhaps outdoors) that you are able to do on a regular basis, can have a hugely positive effect on your state of mind. They are quite often talked about, but endorphins are not to be sneered at for their wonderful healing qualities.

My particular love is swimming, and I regularly try and do an hour or so at my gym. I confess that I am not one for gym, zumba or other sweaty pursuits, but prefer to spend any free time in the water. I think I must have been a mermaid in a previous life, as when I see water, I have a compulsion to get in it. I especially love swimming in the sea, although the water needs to be above arctic temperature to lure me in.

It is also really important to endeavour to eat reasonably well – if you stuff yourself with all sorts of rubbish, it is patently obvious that you are going to feel yuck, so eating 3 regular, healthy meals and drinking lots of water will have a noticeable effect on your mind’s health. I always feel much better if I eat lightly, but well.

Lastly, it is vital to get plenty of rest – never underestimate the importance of a good night’s sleep – and also perhaps have a little nap in the day if you can, but don’t allow it to go on for longer than 20 minutes, otherwise you may feel even more groggy.

These are all simple things, but they can have a really positive effect on your mental health and achieve a lasting sense of wellbeing.

Best wishes,
Wendy

Most people will be well aware by now of the government campaign to get people to give up smoking ‘just for October’ with the thought being that if you are able to give up for 4 weeks, you are much more likely to stay off the ciggies for life.

Whilst this may be true for some people, others that I have spoken to say that those first few weeks are actually quite easy, and then they can sometimes have a craving a month or so after having given up. The point is everyone is different and no two people have the same degree of motivation for giving up. What is universally agreed upon is that it is not an easy thing to do, and any help and support that we can get whilst in the process of stopping smoking is very welcome.

My stop smoking hypnosis package includes a thorough consultation, in which I find out what smoking does for you and how we can find other ways to fulfil those needs. We then have the hypnosis session itself, which usually lasts around 1 1/2 – 2 hours, and is uniquely tailored to your own personality and situation. You are provided with a CD to use at home, along with the option of a follow-up session, if needed. However, I generally find that the one session is enough to set you on your way. Most of my clients who come for smoking cessation hypnosis find that, after treatment, it is relatively easy as they no longer have any desire or craving for cigarettes, and their subconscious mind has found other much more healthy ways that they are able employ to de-stress.

I do not need to remind anyone of the dangers of smoking, as we are all aware of the increased risk of cancers, heart disease and lung problems.

Many people do not know, however, about other health problems that have a direct correlation with smoking. One of these is age-related macular degeneration (a type of blindness), and my mum was unfortunate enough to contract this, and has had to have regular injections directly into the eye which have saved the sight in one eye, but not the other. This has been so debilitating for my mum, it has meant that she has lost all of her confidence going out as she is worried about tripping up, and also she had to give up driving which was something she loved and gave her a great deal of independence. She also has problems seeing the television, reading and knitting – all things which she used to love doing.  It is probable that her condition would have been precipated by smoking.

If you are thinking of giving up – not just for October – and feel that hypnosis would really set you on the right path, do please give me a call on 01449 780352 or 0781 7158429, or email me wendy@wendychalk.co.uk.

Wendy x

Last night I went with my younger son to watch our team, Ipswich Town, play Wolves. We were looking forward to the game, had a good feeling about it, and felt that – after a dodgy start to the season – our Tractor boys were going to play up and get a really good result.

Well, we ended up being disappointed as it turned out as the Town did not play at all well, and lost 2-0 to a decidedly average Wolves. Never mind.

Where we sit in the ground, we have a brilliant view of the match, but unfortunately behind us is a lady who I shall call Mrs Negativity, and throughout most of the game she commented on every single mistake our team made, how poor they were, how terrible it is to watch, and how bad the team is – and yes, she is an Ipswich Town supporter. My son and I got so fed up at one point that we almost turned round and had a word with her – why on earth does she still keep coming, only to moan throughout the whole match. I made a particular point of cheering when Ipswich played well, and commenting positively on their play, although it must be said that as the game went on, this was quite difficult to do.

I really hope that our team manages to turn things round, but the point I want to make here is that some people really do seem to actually enjoy being negative, they absolutely thrive on it, but they can be unaware of how it ‘pollutes’ the area around them by sending out these negative vibes. I do sometimes even think that a team can even tend to absorb the feelings given out by the supporters, although in saying this I am not excusing the players of not playing up.

Some people that I meet have problems working or living with people who give out this ‘negative’ energy – they find that they absorb it, and end up feeling miserable or drained, despite being generally optimistic people themselves.

We have all met or come into contact with these types of people, and the first thing we have to realise is that we cannot change them, but what we CAN change is our response to them. Through hypnotherapy and NLP, it is possible to use our imaginations to protect ourselves from the doom and gloom-mongers, and this can be done in all sorts of ways by using our own creative minds. Sometimes in hypnosis clients can imagine that they are surrounded by a very protective bubble, and this enables them to ‘bounce off’ any negative energy that might be around them. Or else, the difficult person can be ‘shrunk down’ and their voice reduced to a tiny squeak, so they do not affect us in the same way. This type of therapy can be used with great effect with children, as they have such imaginative minds and usually come up with all sorts of ways that they can protect themselves in difficult encounters.

Call me on 01449 780352 or 07817158429 to find out how hypnotherapy and NLP could help you.

Wendy x

PS. By the way, for those of you who read my last blog, my musical son is loving life in Birmingham and enjoying fresher’s week to the full. House is very quiet though. W

As we speak, Mr Chalk is taking eldest son up to Birmingham Conservatoire, so he can start his four year course in jazz piano, and I am so very proud of him.

It has been a really stressful few days. Telephone calls to the student loan company trying to find out when his grant would be coming through, trying to make sure that he has everything he needs on his list, and then receiving his desperate call on Friday afternoon to tell me that he had driven into the back of another car.  Thankfully, he was unhurt, but very shook up, and my car looks as though it could be a write-off. It may have been prophetic that I was talking about stress in my last blog.

I thought that I would feel more wretched waving him off this morning, and it was true that I did feel sad as I will miss him terribly. However, a sense of calm and relief seemed to descend on me as I know that now is the right time for him to go, he is doing the course that he wanted to do, he is staying in a really nice hall of residence (with en-suite rooms for heaven sake!) and he is now able to do what he really loves to do, play music, all the time. Actually, in all honesty, I’m probably a bit jealous.

As a parent, all we can wish for for our children is happiness, and I know that Olly has it within him to do what makes him happy, he has been one of the lucky ones who has found the key to his personal bliss early in life.

So, although I know that there will be hard times when money is tight, he misses my cooking (or maybe not) and has the stress of exams and performances, overall he will love it, because he will be immersed in music, and will be with ‘his people’.

My very best wishes to all of those going away to university, and to those sending them off.  You just have to let them fly now.

Wendy x

PS. I think I may leave it a little while before I go in his room.

Recent research from University College London indicates that job-related stress can lead to increased risk from heart attacks. No surprise there really.

However, they point out that it is often those who work in very mundane, repetitive jobs and have little control over the work that they do can suffer more from stress, compared to those who are in potentially much more stressful situations, such as
medical professionals working in an A&E Department. These are clearly examples of very different kinds of stress, and it is true that it can come in different forms, including having too little to do, as well as having too much.

We can also experience stress in the form of difficult relationships, having to cope with illness, financial worries, family troubles as well as job or career challenges.

Nobody ever has a totally stress-free life, and nor would they want it. There has been much said in the news recently about how a certain amount of stress is actually good for us, but as always, its getting the balance right and unfortunately this is not really under our control.

However, what IS within our control is our response to the stress in our lives, and this can be managed by making sure that we keep ourselves in the best possible health, physically and emotionally. Obviously looking after our bodies by putting good natural food inside them is important, as well as taking regular exercise. Finding a physical activity which we really enjoy and can do easily and often is a wonderful way of dealing with stress, as is finding a way to relax by practising meditation, self-hypnosis or yoga.

Sometimes it is really necessary to take a good hard look at our lives, in order to assess where we can perhaps make things easier for ourselves. Often when I see clients they feel so close to their situation that it seems impossible for them to make change. By helping them to take a step back, and also to really look at their lives from a different perspective, they are then able to see ways that they can instigate change in order to make their lives easier but also more satisfying.

Stress is one of those necessary evils, but it is possible to respond to it in a positive way, and even using it creatively to make changes that may be long overdue.

If you would like to have a chat with me to find out how hypnotherapy can help you to deal with stress in your life, then please call me on 01449 780352 or 0781 7158429, or email me on wendy@wendychalk.co.uk.

The panorama programme on BBC1 the other evening presented by the wonderful Joan Bakewell, ‘Old, Drunk & Disorderly’ made interesting, if somewhat disturbing viewing.

We seem to be well aware these days of the excessive  and all-to-evident drinking amongst the young (as someone whose son will soon be sampling the delights of fresher’s week in Birmingham, this is home territory for me) but perhaps less so of the ever-rising drinking habit in the elderly.

The over-60s appear to be a very vulnerable group, in terms of loneliness, depression and lack of purpose and this can lead to addictive habits such as drinking, in the hope of gaining some comfort and solace. A daily habit of having a glass of wine at ‘that certain time of day’ can soon lead to the consumption of a whole bottle during the evening, as the programme alarmingly reported. And even those who do not consume this much may well be exceeding the government’s recommended limit of units, as Dame Joan herself found, after keeping a drink diary for a month. It seems to be all to easy to drink to excess, and it may well be that elderly people feel that, at this time of life, they can do what they want, and do not feel that they should be dictated to by the nanny state.

However, I think in truth that most people recognise the dangers of drinking too much, and particularly in old age recognise that it can have a disastrous effect on health in so many ways – not just the usual liver disease, stroke, diabetes, heart problems – but also is a major risk factor in hastening the onset of dementia and can cause depression and mental illness.

The problem is, whilst we can recognise that we are drinking too much, it is often difficult to cut down.

As a hypnotherapist, I see a lot of people who are keen to cut down their drinking, and it is important to recognise that the drink is serving some kind of need. Once this fact is realised, then we can work on replacing the drinking habit with another (healthy and life-affirming) habit which will provide comfort and solace, but without the negative consequences on health.  In addition, suggestions given during hypnosis can be very powerful in getting the person to drink really slowly, and be satisfied with just one glass – people often say that they feel so much better and feel the benefit of this, and so they also then go on to have a couple of nights a week (at least) where they are not drinking.

I like a nice glass of something chilled as much as the next person, but I am aware of enjoying it so much more by limiting it.  As in all things, moderation is the key.

If you feel that your drinking habit it spiralling out of control, do contact me on 01449 780352, or 07817158429, or email me on wendy@wendychalk.co.uk to have a chat about how I can help you.

Wendy x

I think that the NHScampaign encouraging people to stop smoking just for the month of October – Stoptober – is an excellent idea. It is certainly the case that if you can give up a habit for a period of 4 weeks, then it is much more likely that you are going to be able to give up that habit for life.

The first few weeks of giving up are sometimes the most difficult, as it seems strange and alien ‘not to be doing that thing that you do’, and there are times when the urge to give in is really strong. The reason for this is that your subconscious is still telling you that you want, and need that cigarette, even though your conscious mind has decided, very sensibly, to give up this habit.

However, with hypnosis, it seems that people do find it easier to give up, as the subconscious is given very strong suggestions during the hypnotherapy session, which mean that all parts of you are in agreement about stopping smoking, not just the conscious part. Very often I find that clients who have experienced my stop smoking treatment tell me that they find that they do not have any cravings at all, and the wonderful thing is that this feeling lasts, so giving up is actually much easier than they thought it would be. An added by-product is that they feel much calmer, and less stressed generally after the treatment.

If you are thinking about giving up for ‘Stoptober’ but feel that you need a little help in the process, do please contact me on 01449 780352 or 0781 7158429, or email me on wendy@wendychalk.co.uk.

Wendy x

I do think that more people are starting to accept hypotherapy as a valid and effective treatment for many psychological and emotional disorders, and not just the slightly strange and quirky alternative therapy practised by Mr or Mrs Weird for stopping smoking.

Even medical practitioners themselves have begun to wake up to the fact that hypnosis can be used to treat seemingly ‘physical’ disorders such as IBS. Also, in terms of pain relief, there is recognition that hypnosis can be really effective – more and more women are opting for hypno-birthing in order to have as natural and relaxing birth experience as possible. Midwives are being trained in the technique, so that they can offer this as an option.

I am really hopeful that this acceptance of hypnotherapy by the mainstream will continue, but my concern is that it will be seen as just another ‘tool’ that any medical practitioner can use, and ‘bite-size’ hypnosis will be used by inexperienced and unqualifed people, with very limited results.

When I began as a hypnotherapist, I did rely to a certain extent on ‘scripts’, these are suggestions used in hypnosis which cover a whole range of subjects from weight loss to depression. However, I soon found that it was really important to tailor the hypnosis suggestions to the client, and in this way the most effective results can be achieved. A skilled hypnotherapist will find out as much as he or she can, and really listen to the language of the client, before then ‘crafting’ the therapy treatment.

And I do really believe it is a ‘craft’, not something that can be formalised or scripted, and this is where the real magic occurs. This is the creative part of my work that I love, as by using what I am presented with, I can then ‘weave’ my therapeutic intervention, with often really amazing results. I realise that I am beginning to sound more like Mrs Weird here!

I think maybe that this is where the medical profession seem to find it difficult, as this type of therapy cannot be quantified, measured or assessed in the same way that conventional treatments can be.

But my hope is that, in the years to come, there is even more recognition that hypnotherapy (in the hands of a qualified, experience clinical practitioner) can be extremely effective and ultimately life changing, in the way it can lead people to find the solutions they long for.

Wendy x

I am an avid fan of the BBC2 programme ‘Great British Bake Off’ and it never ceases to amaze me what wonderful creations these amateur bakers can produce under really stressful conditions.

I love cooking and baking myself, but it is all really quite homely fare, although occasionally I set myself a slightly more difficult challenge, and really enjoy the whole process of planning and then painstakingly creating my very own work of art. I find that I can become so involved in decorating a cake, and several hours can pass by without me realising it. For me, making and decorating a cake for somebody’s birthday, anniversary or any sort of occasion is something that I love to do, an almost meditative act in which I can completely lose myself.

Mary Berry revealed recently that she found a great deal of comfort in baking after the death of her grown-up son, and also the novelist Marian Keyes has written about the fact that baking has helped alleviate her spells of depression. It does certainly seem to be an activity which is regaining popularity, as more people are finding how relaxing and rewarding it can be.

But it doesn’t have to be baking. I firmly believe that we all possess a creative part, and once we can find something that this part of our mind can really focus on, then it often means that other worries or anxieties are completely forgotten about. In this ‘creative meditation’ our analytical, ruminating mind can be still for once, and we can allow ourselves that sense of peace and relaxation which comes from merely focussing on what we are doing.

Whether that is baking, making model aeroplanes, gardening or painting. It really doesn’t matter ……

Wendy x

I would guess that about 40% of my clients come to me wanting to lose weight. And out of those, I often then find that in actual fact, weight is not the main issue which concerns them.

When we start to scratch the surface we usually discover other issues which are often at the root cause of an unhealthy relationship with food and this could be a difficult relationship, lack of confidence, boredom, dissatisfaction at work and sometimes even a physical illness.  Therefore it is very important that I find out as much as I can about the client before starting their treatment, this ensures that we are tackling the root, as opposed to just the symptom. Once the client can start to gain a different perspective on ‘what lies beneath’ and starts to believe that change is possible, then the weight often seems to drop off as a matter of course.

Many of the people I see seem to be less bothered about their weight, but more concerned about their eating habits. Through years of dieting, there appears to be this obsession with food – we can no longer just wake up and say ‘what do I really fancy eating today’, but everything has to be analysed, weighed, portion-sized to the extreme. This need for control at all times very often then leads to the other extreme – a total binge on all the wrong sorts of foods/drinks, and then feeling totally disgusting afterwards.

Through hypnotherapy, we can actually address our root needs and then what often happens is that our minds and bodies find balance once again, everything ‘feels’ right and we no longer need to resort to extremes of behaviour, like overeating. A client said to me the other day that she finally felt ‘free’ after years of fad diets and eating plans. Therefore she was allowing herself to eat whatever she wanted, but oddly she no longer felt the need to.

Do get in touch if you would love to have that same sense of freedom around food – wendy@wendychalk.co.uk or phone me on 01449 780352 / 07817158429.

Wendy x