I was lucky enough to be able to attend a presentation at the Royal Society of Medicine recently about the causes of depression. We tend to think that clinical depression is ‘all in the mind’ and that there is perhaps only a tenuous link with physical health.

The meeting that I attended turned this on its head and the various presenters put forward clinical data and research to prove that depressive symptoms can be caused by an imbalance in the body, specifically an excess of inflammation. Having read Professor Ed Bullmore’s book, The Inflamed Mind (2018), I was keen to find out more.

First of all we do need to recognise that depression is a very complex issue. It is a blanket term and the illness itself can present itself differently in each individual who suffers from it. Furthermore there are usually many factors predisposing someone to depression including inherited traits, difficult and challenging circumstances, poverty and childhood trauma, to name a few. It is important that each case is considered individually in order to best find the right treatment.

The meeting I attended put forward another suggestion that imbalance in the body, particularly inflammation, may also be responsible for causing depression. One could argue that suffering with arthritis would lead you to feel depressed but data and research put forward by the presenters suggested that the inflammation was a direct causal factor in clinical depression. To this end there are clinical trials taking place this year to explore the use of anti-inflammatory medication in depression which, some felt, would lead to much better results than the existing anti-depressant drugs which are used.

This is a really interesting development in the field of mental health and in a sense acknowledges the direct link between the body and the mind. It will probably be some time before we can see the new drugs on the market place but we are at liberty to look at other causes of inflammation, namely poor diet, lack of exercise and poor stress management. We already acknowledge the fact that an unhealthy lifestyle causes damage to the body. Now we have very real proof that it can negatively affect the mind too.

Best wishes,
Wendy x

January can be a brutal month, don’t you think? A distinct lack of the things that make life a bit easier, like money, alcohol, sunshine, the list goes on. Although I don’t really like resolutions I – stupidly – said I was going to do a dry January. This lasted about 4 days before I caved. I have, however, continued with intermittent fasting and a paleo type diet as this makes me feel really good. I have also been using the long winter days to do some research into the keto diet (very low carb, high fat) specifically finding ways I can adapt my baking to keto. I have always loved baking so I am really enjoying finding different ways I can still make yummy cakes and biscuits without refined sugars and flours.

Even so, the January blues are a real phenomenon, so anything which happens during this gnarly old month to lift the spirits is really welcome.

I was delighted yesterday, therefore, when I received a most wonderful letter from a lovely gent, 91 years young, called Denis, who knew my mum.

My mum and Denis had always corresponded since working together at the NatWest bank in Stowmarket in the 1940s. I was therefore sad to have to write to let him know that my mum had passed away last year. I did not put my address in the letter and I feel awful about this now as Denis had to go to so much trouble to write back. Denis typed two letters, one to the care home telling them about his friendship with my mum and asking if they would kindly forward the other letter to me. They did this so yesterday I had the sheer joy of receiving a very newsy, interesting and beautifully typed (I don’t think Denis has an Apple Mac) letter, detailing his life and his work, his friendship with my mum and how he was now on his own having lost his wife of 49 years to cancer and then his partner to Alzheimer’s.

He told me about the fun that they used to have working at the bank with their other work colleagues and the characters of the bank managers (one who was very much like Captain Mainwaring apparently). I could remember some of the names from mum, it was almost like having her back for a little while.

Denis, although now on his own, still had loads of friends as well as a sister in Colchester who is 96! He said that he gets about on his mobility scooter and hoped he hadn’t turned into a grumpy old man. It certainly didn’t seem so from the letter.

It really was like a little drop of sunshine in a dull old January – a cockle warmer – thank you so much Denis! I doubt you have even realised the joy that your letter has brought.

By the way, I have written back and hope to continue corresponding with Denis. In a world of bullying tweets and emails, a parliament in disarray, it is a beautiful thing to write and receive letters.
It may be old-fashioned but I really couldn’t care less.

Happy January everyone!
Wendy x

As this funny old year draws to a close we can mull over what has happened in our lives over the last 12 months, the good, the bad and the same old sort of stuff we normally get.

For myself it has been a difficult year, I will not lie. My mum had so many health issues that we were virtually on constant call with the care home. She ended up in hospital several times with pneumonia, sepsis as well as a broken hip and it was very clear she was becoming more and more frail as the months passed. She finally passed away in September and in many ways it was a massive relief that she was no longer suffering.

It still feels quite strangely disorientating to be without both mum and dad, it certainly makes you feel much more aware of your own mortality. It seems to have marked a new chapter in my own life where I have a bit more freedom to do the things that I would like to do.

My therapy business remains the one constant, it is something I love and feel wonderfully privileged to be able to do. But there are also other things that I would like to do more of, including playing the piano, creative writing, crochet (still can’t really get the hang of it) walking and much more reading. It is lovely to feel that I can now really put my mind to doing more of these things.

I am still also really interested in the way diet impacts on mental health and will be going on a course at the end of January at the Royal Society of Medicine which explores the effect of inflammation on the brain. The idea that depression could have a physiological – and not so much psychological – cause fascinates me.

How are you feeling as this year draws to a close, and the new one starts? Are there particular aims or goals that you have? Maybe this is the year that you decide to try hypnotherapy for the first time?

Whatever the new year holds for you, may I wish you a very happy, healthy and peaceful one.

All good wishes,
Wendy xx

We are coming up to budget time and the chancellor of the exchequer is promising to boost the budget for mental health by £2 billion.

There are two things that I would say to this :

1)it’s not enough.

2)it’s not just about the money.

The second point here is of vital importance. For too long now the provision of mental health in this country has been abysmally poor and it is not just down to lack of funds. The standard line of treatment for mental health issues is medication (which can actually work very well in some cases, but sadly not all) and also some form of talking therapy.

With regard to the latter the onus is on the patient to contact their local wellbeing service. If they are lucky they may be offered a course of treatment – usually CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy). CBT can sometimes help but in my experience it is of limited value and a number of my own clients report that they actually felt worse after treatment. Very often, however, they have to wait, sometimes several months, before they can receive any treatment at all.

The NHS needs to acknowledge, first of all, that the present system is not working. There then needs to be a complete overhaul of mental health provision.

In my view it does not necessarily have to be costly or complex. But there does need to be a willingness to consider other therapies and not just relying on CBT.

Working with a combination of solution focused therapy, NLP and hypnosis I generally see clients for about 3 sessions, after which they report a massive reduction in symptoms of anxiety and/or depression. I also record a personalised relaxation download which they are encouraged to use regularly.

I keep in contact with clients months and years after they see me. More times than not they report that they have kept very well in the intervening time. Occasionally they book in for a ‘top up’ session.

It’s not rocket science. It just needs to have some fresh thinking and an open mind to different therapies.

Keep warm and well,
Wendy x

It has been a really strange few weeks and I apologise for not having blogged in a while. After several months of declining health and then breaking her hip in
August my dear mum Pam passed away on 17th September.

I have been going to see her mostly every day for as long as I can remember so it has been heartbreaking for me to witness the roller coast of recurrent infections, pneumonia, confusion and then a fall. To be absolutely honest I can say that it is something of a relief that she is finally at peace. Although she had been in hospital many times lately she was able to finally slip away in her lovely care home. My husband and the carers were with her, I was actually having a rest after being with her for most of the day and the previous evening. Apparently it sometimes happens like that, the loved one waits for their closest family member to be absent before they are able to let go.

Since this time I have felt so many different emotions, sadness that mum has finally gone, relief that she is not suffering and she is reunited with dad and also the most overwhelming tiredness. I have been the nearest child to mum and dad and so the last few years have been quite stressful, being responsible for them in their declining years.

Dad suffered with dementia and he passed away two years ago, but I am really happy that, before he died, I managed to find a wonderful care home which could accommodate both mum and dad. It was a big adjustment for them but my brother and I knew they could no longer manage at home, my mum having health issues of her own. They were able to spend dad’s last few months together.

There are times now when it catches me that both mum and dad have gone and it feels so odd. I have no particular religious beliefs but I do like to think that they are still with me in some sense.

My wonderful Mr Chalk has been such a support to me in all of this and something he did for me truly helped me to feel calm. He downloaded (I don’t even know if that’s the term any more) loads of different songs that he knew I would love on my phone so I have been listening to them in the car in all the journeys I have been doing. I have to listen to them as my car radio has broken but that’s fine by me. It’s like the modern day version of a mix tape and it’s the most romantic thing in the world.

Grief is a funny thing. You just have to go with it, but accept the love of others and above all, be gentle on yourself.

Wendy xx

I thought I would share with you a very powerful tool that I use to help keep me mentally and physically healthy.

I have been practicing this off and on for about a year now and I find it incredibly freeing and energising.

During the day I do not eat but just have coffee, green tea or water. I do not have breakfast or lunch but I usually have a small healthy snack about 5ish, then my meal with Mr Chalk followed by fruit/dessert of some kind. I tend to eat healthy unprocessed foods but do not deprive myself and still indulge in alcohol, chocolate and cake!

It does sound fairly drastic but the benefits I have found with this lifestyle are many including :

A freedom from thinking about food constantly
Having loads of time in the day to do things
Keeping weight at a healthy level
Enjoying the food that I have in the evening far more than before
Feeling more energised and better able to cope with stress
Feeling calmer and more relaxed

All this, as well as the incredibly powerful health benefits of intermittent fasting. Apparently what happens when we fast is that our bodies are able to do an internal ‘declutter’ that is get rid of all the toxins and nasties in a way that they cannot do if we are constantly eating. It has been used for centuries as a way to heal the body.

I realise that this way of life is not for everyone but I personally have found it freeing. I tend to relax when I am on holiday as I feel that life is for living but then afterwards I am more than ready to fast again.

A book I have found really useful in this has been ‘Delay, don’t deny’ by Gin Stephens.

We are all a work in progress and need to find our own way but I thought I would share with you how fasting seems to work for me.

Best wishes everyone,
Wendy x

As I write this my 90 year old mum, Pam, is undergoing surgery for a broken hip. She has been a poor old thing, having suffered recurrent infections over the last few months and then having a bad fall last week. This is the third time she has been in hospital in 5 months and you begin to wonder how much more she can take.

It does also make you think about your own health as you are getting older and how it is important to relish every single moment as we all succumb eventually to frailty – even the most hale and hearty will eventually become weaker and then be much more dependent on others for their care.

It has been an incredibly difficult and worrying time with my mum but what has been amazing to witness each time she becomes ill is her indomitable spirit. She has a strength and tenacity that I have not really acknowledged before. In fact I have to admit to perceiving her at times to be a very negative person as she often seemed to be complaining about things.

I now realise I was wrong about her and it’s seeing how she has coped over the last few months which has changed my opinion. I can understand the reasons for her negativity much more and have seen a strength and resilience there that I am in awe of.

I believe that we each have a very strong inner core which can help us in rough times and the human spirit is far more resilient than we think.

Here’s to Pam.

Best wishes,
Wendy x

We have all been awed by the rescue of the twelve Thai boys from a cave in Chiang Rai in Northern Ireland. This is a truly wonderful story, tinged with sadness due to the death of a Thai diver in the course of the rescue attempt.

Seeing them in their hospital beds looking well and happy and talking about their favourite foods is a delight, it’s something which seemed impossible a week ago.

The boys still have to recover their strength and adjust to normal life again after such a traumatic ordeal. However I was interested to read that their coach had trained as a monk and kept the boys going by meditating with them as well as helping them to visualise being rescued, seeing their families once again and remaining strong.

These techniques are very similar to hypnotherapy as in essence what happens in a session is that the body and mind are encouraged to relax (similar to meditation) then to focus the mind on what the person really wants to achieve, imagining what this will feel, look and sound like.

It’s not rocket science but these sorts of techniques can be incredibly powerful in encouraging a positive mindset which was what the Thai footballers needed to keep them strong.

Best wishes,
Wendy x

So we are all feeling very sad this morning following the England team’s departure from the World Cup. There is a palpable collective heartbreak as we were so incredibly close to that final.

I have to admit to going into the kitchen to do the washing up (which I hate) when they went into extra time. Honestly I felt that, by that time, we were tired and Croatia were very combative and I couldn’t face the inevitable.

BUT, hasn’t our young England team been amazing?

Hasn’t it filled you with so much pride to see this band of humble young men from all different background and ethnicities work so hard together as a team. No divas, no bad WAG behaviour, no Rooney foul language but instead just a group of really quite ordinary boys that we can all identify with as our sons, brothers, mates, boyfriends. They really are an inspiration to our young people.

And then the man in the waistcoat! What can you say that hasn’t been said?! His genuine, caring, calm personality came through so strongly yesterday when his first thought after the final whistle was to go and hug each and every player. He is truly a breath of fresh air.

Yes it is sad and we can feel so heartbroken that it was in reach and we didn’t quite get there. However, this is the start and it is truly exciting to have a great English team again.

Best wishes,
Wendy.

ps apologies to all of those people who havn’t been following the football, so this blog means nothing to you at all.

I have to admit to being a bit of a footie fan and I am loving the World Cup. Mr Chalk and I are settling down most evenings with a glass of something cool and refreshing to watch the wonderful entertainment.

And it has been entertaining: from the strange and sometimes quite tuneless national anthems to the passionate, painted fans and then all the drama which actually occurs on the pitch. The histrionics of certain players (yes Neymar, how can you not feel just a bit ashamed of yourself – what do you take us for?) then the utter desolation of just losing in the last minute. I felt so sorry for the Japanese players yesterday, they had been by far the better side against Belgium for the majority of the game.

As I write this the England players will be getting ready for the knockout game against Columbia this evening. I was very heartened to read that Gareth Southgate has been working with sports psychologists on the mental side of the game and not just when it concerns penalties. This has had the result that our England team do seem so much more composed and confident than they have been in previous years.

I would argue that getting the mindset right in any sport is paramount. I have worked with people from a range of different sports including showjumping, golf, football and darts and they have all benefitted from the confidence that hypnotherapy has given them. As well as the sessions themselves I also record a very powerful hypnosis download which can help improve their performance.

I am really hopeful for England’s performance this evening and I think that this time they do seem to have the right mindset for winning.

Come on boys! Do us proud.

Best wishes,
Wendy x