Being laid up after my foot operation, I have had the opportunity to do lots of reading which has been lovely. I do admit to have been watching some TV too but also trying to limit it – endless episodes of ‘Married At First Sight’ can make you feel a bit nauseous after a while!
One of the books I read was by Matthew Perry entitled ‘Friends, lovers and the Big Terrible Thing’. If you were a Friends watcher, like me, you will no doubt remember Matthew as the hilarious (and troubled) Chandler Bing. The role was quite literally made for him, you could say a case of art imitating life, although he almost missed out on it as he was contractually bound to another series but, fortunately, a way was found for him to take up the role.
Although Matthew was a uniquely talented actor and achieved his goal of superstardom, he had a huge addiction problem. It started with alcohol and then went onto prescription painkillers. His untimely death last year was found out to have been caused by a massive dose of ketamine in his system. He was in rehab many times but sadly never seemed to be able to overcome his addictions. He had had a difficult childhood, with his parents separating when he was very young and neither of them really being there to support him.
I was interested to find out that he visited a hypnotherapist to give up smoking and not just any hypnotherapist, this was Hollywood’s finest, the one all the superstars went to. It seems that the hypnotherapist practiced a form of aversion therapy, so this would entail suggestions of the awful things that would happen if he continue to smoke (his health was severely comprised at this point). Needless to say, the hypnotherapy didn’t work and only served to deepen his anxiety and trauma.
I am always interested to find out about the different types of interventions taken by hypnotherapists. However, after 15 years of working with many different anxiety issues, I have found that a solution-focused modality is by far the most successful. At the root of most addictions – be it food, cigarettes, alcohol or drugs – is an underlying anxiety or trauma. The addict has found he can temporarily stop these awful feelings by the use of substances. A quick simple fix.
My hypnotherapy intervention does not involve going over and over what caused the anxiety in the first place, the client will often be acutely aware of this already. Instead, my aim is to help the client to achieve a deep state of calm and peace within themselves by the use of hypnosis and then also self-hypnosis. It takes work and practice, but once the client realises he has the power within to change his mindset without the substance, it is an incredible feeling.
Matthew Perry’s book was terribly poignant, the latter chapters seemed to involve him repeating the narrative ‘well, at least I’m still here’. What a sad loss of a truly talented and wonderful actor and one wonders that if he had received the right therapy, he would still be with us.
Warmest wishes to you all,
Wendy x
